Can you get banned from Facebook forever? The answer is most certainly “yes.”
Jason Birch just found this out the hard way. The social media giant won’t tell him why he’s permanently banished, but Birch thinks he knows where he went wrong. He says he’s learned from his “little” mistake and would like Facebook to lift the ban and accept his apology. And he’s not prepared to take no for an answer.
- Similarly, you might be tempted to date a younger woman rather than someone your own age because of a cliched idea that they have a relative lack of 'issues', are more wild, fun, flexible, and so on.
- “These days it's common to ghost someone you've met both on dating apps and offline,” says Spira. Why it happens varies from ghost to ghost, but Spria says what it really comes down to is the.
Some people put an incognito message in their profiles on general dating sites, writing out 437737—it spells “herpes” on a dial pad—in their profiles. Others just write, “I have herpes. People permanently banned from Twitter (Most recent on top:) On February 11, 2021, Project Veritas, an activist journalism organization founded by journalist James O'Keefe, was permanently banned for 'repeated violations of the platform's policies prohibiting sharing — or threats of sharing — other people's private information without consent.'
But is there any way back into the Facebook community after you’ve been banned?
We know from the plethora of requests for help that we receive about locked accounts that Facebook is more willing than ever to ban users who don’t follow their rules.
These former Facebookers who contact us all want the same thing: to reclaim their accounts and return to the popular virtual community. Unfortunately for them, this goal may be impossible. So it’s crucial that users acquaint themselves with Facebook’s community standards — before they end up on the outside looking in. Because as we saw this week, no one is immune to a Facebook banishment — not even the President of the United States.
Surprise! Facebook Messenger is not private
Birch says that his unexpected Facebook troubles began one evening when he was using Facebook Messenger.
“After a concert, I logged onto Facebook and was talking to a friend,” Birch recalled. “I was on my laptop and I accidentally sent a partial nude photo. A few minutes later, I received an alert that Facebook blocked me.”
From that moment last summer, Birch has been on an aggressive crusade to get his Facebook account reactivated.
He’s sent numerous emails to the Facebook team asking, then begging, them to forgive him and reactivate his account. He insists that uploading the “partial nude” was a mistake and he thought Facebook Messenger was private.
FYI: Facebook Messenger isn’t private. Nothing on Facebook is private.
“I sent this photo through a private Facebook message. I did not post it on Facebook,” Birch pleaded. “The Facebook scanner detected it was inappropriate. I was banned from Facebook immediately. Please, I just want my account back.”
The Facebook Team: “You’re ineligible to use Facebook.”
Throughout the next several months, Birch continued to send a steady stream of emails to the Facebook team.
I don’t use Facebook for porn. All I use it for is to keep in contact with friends and family. I’ve had this account since my teen years and want to get all my photos and memories back. I also have several family members that I can only get in contact with through Facebook. This has been such a stressful five months. It was an accident and it won’t happen again. I never meant to send that photo. I miss my family and friends on Facebook. Please unblock my account.
The Facebook Team did not respond in the way, Birch hoped.
Although initially Birch’s paper trail shows what appears to be auto-generated responses to his pleas, Facebook soon sent a definitive answer.
Hi, Jason,
We’ve determined that you are ineligible to use Facebook. To learn more about Facebook’s policies, please review the Facebook Statement of Rights and Responsibilities:
https://www.facebook.com/legal/terms/
Unfortunately, for safety and security reasons, we can’t provide additional information as to why your account was disabled. We appreciate your understanding, as this decision is final. (Facebook team)
No appeal process
But Birch was anything but “understanding” about this decision.
What kind of %#*& customer service is this that it takes over five months to
even try to get ahold of a real human being to help with a problem!!!!
This is horrible.
Not knowing where else to turn, his next email was to the Elliott Advocacy team.
When I received Birch’s request for help, I reviewed his giant paper trail. Unfortunately, I knew that his case was likely one that we could not successfully advocate.
Although we receive many requests for help concerning banned Facebook accounts, our track record for resolving these cases is zero.
In fact, Facebook, like other giant companies such as Amazon and eBay, typically ignores these types of inquiries from our team:
It would seem that after these companies take the drastic step of banning a user, there is little to no appeal process.
Fact: You aren’t a customer of Facebook
And the unique nature of Facebook makes this type of case impossible to mediate.
- Facebook is a free service. Users are not customers. And although Birch was outraged by the “terrible customer service” he received from Facebook, he shouldn’t have been. Facebook is providing an online social community free of charge to the user. The Facebook Team is not a “customer service team,” and users should not expect the type of personalized attention a complaint would receive from a company of which they are actually paying customers.
- When you sign up with Facebook, you agree to its terms and conditions. If you violate any of those terms, you can get banned — with no clear-cut methods of appealing the decision.
- Facebook doesn’t owe you an account. There are no current laws that require Facebook to allow anyone to participate.
So there is very little on which our team could base a mediation attempt over a banned Facebook account. And, unfortunately, by Birch’s own admission, he had violated one of Facebook’s terms and conditions.
But I sent Birch’s case over to the Facebook Team and asked them if they could review it. Based on his lengthy paper trail, it was clear that this banishment was consuming his time and attention. I thought if Facebook could give him a response that left no room for interpretation, he might be able to move on without Facebook.
As I expected, several weeks went by, and all I received from the Facebook Team was an assurance that they would get back to me soon.
Banned from Facebook forever?
In the meantime, Birch had continued on with his mission. Not following the helpful self-advocacy guidance Christopher Elliott gives in his article on the topic, Birch bombarded Facebook with more requests to have the ban lifted. Inexplicably, he even sent the “partial nude” photo he thought got him banned back to Facebook to tell the team he learned a lesson.
Dec 20, 2018
I am rather upset that Facebook disabled my account for this long for an accidental partial nude photo! I just talked to one of my friends and she said she had received [frontal nudity pictures] through Facebook and nothing happened to the other person’s account!! So why on earth did Facebook disable mine, for one, an artistic photo, and two an accidental click/upload on it?!
Dec 25, 2018
Can someone unlock my account? It’s Christmas. Facebook has punished me for far too long.
Dec 28, 2018
Please someone, how long until I get my account back?
Jan 2
Well, happy new year. Can someone on the Facebook team help me get my account back, please?
Jan 2
All this over an accidental photo. It’s rather upsetting.
Jan 6
Why are you guys refusing to help me?! I feel like I’m being discriminated against as a gay man who made a mistake!
Banning Dating Someone From Behind
Then Birch sent additional letters to Mark Zuckerberg and Sheryl Sandberg. Not surprisingly, he didn’t receive a response to those messages.
Facebook: “Your account is permanently disabled”
Finally, Birch did receive a crystal clear message from a first-name-only Facebook team member. “Maxie” sent what should have provided the closure Birch needed — his Facebook ban is permanent.
Your account has been permanently disabled for not following the Facebook Community Standards. Unfortunately, we won’t be able to reactivate it for any reason.
This will be our last email regarding your account. For more information about our policies, please review the Facebook Community Standards:
Banning Dating Someone From Slamming
https://www.facebook.com/communitystandards/ (Facebook Team)
However, Birch still wasn’t willing to give up. When I suggested to Birch that it was time to let this battle go, he told me he will not give up. And he insists that he’s not going to stop trying to get his Facebook life back.
Ways to get banned from Facebook
Facebook’s Community Standards page is where users can learn how to stay a Facebook member in good standing.
Beyond the obvious ways to get banned from Facebook, there are a variety of more subtle things that we know can end in the disabling of a user account:
- Using a fake name
Although it is not uncommon to see Facebook accounts in nicknames or self-created monikers, this is something that can get an account banned. Using a name other than your legal name is a violation of Facebook’s terms and conditions. - Creating multiple Facebook accounts
If you create more than one Facebook account, you might suddenly find yourself with zero. Facebook allows just one account per person. - “Friending” too many people in a short period
Facebook is always scanning for fake accounts. If your account mimics the patterns of a fake account, you could get banned right along with the phony ones. Friending large numbers of people in a short period can end with your account being shut down. - Liking too many things
This is another signal that an account may not be real and Facebook might disable it. - Posting spammy-type posts
No one likes spam in their newsfeed. If you’re posting it, you’re at risk of having your account flagged. - Posting fake news/ untrue information
We all have friends who repost alerts and memes that contain urban legends or completely untrue information. This behavior can also lead to Facebook disabling your account. All Facebook users should fact check before resharing any posts. - Posting offensive photos or memes
Remember, this also includes posting things through Facebook Messenger. As we’ve seen in this case, the same rules that apply to your public Facebook page apply to anything you send via messenger as well. Facebook monitors it all.
Remember to keep in mind what Facebook is and what it isn’t
- Facebook is not a photo storage service.
Don’t rely on Facebook to store your memories. Facebook makes no guarantees that it is safely storing your photos on its site. And if you should find your account disabled, as Birch and others have, you won’t be able to get your photos back. Without fail, the consumers who have contacted us about banned accounts are most disturbed by the loss of their pictures. So you can avoid finding yourself in this situation, make sure that you’ve backed up your photos outside of the Facebook platform. - Facebook is not your Rolodex.
Don’t rely on Facebook to store your personal contacts. Birch, like others, complained that he lost touch with friends and family after Facebook disabled his account. Make sure to keep the contact information of treasured friends and family stored offline. Having no way outside of a virtual community to reach a valued “friend” is always a mistake. - Facebook is not Amazon.
Many consumers contact our team after they’ve ordered products from an ad they’ve seen on Facebook — and things have gone wrong. Shopping on Facebook is not the same as shopping on Amazon. Keep in mind the lack of customer service provided by Facebook should you decide to go shopping there. You’ll want to research the merchant and make sure it’s reputable before handing over your credit card. - The Elliott Advocacy team can’t get you unbanned from Facebook.
Once Facebook has disabled your account, the Elliott Advocacy team can’t directly help. But our research team compiled a list of executive contacts you can use to try to get your account reactivated. You can find those Facebook company contacts here. Good luck! (Michelle Couch-Friedman, Elliott Advocacy)
Last September I came across a standout submission to a dating column on Teen Vogue. After leaving a date, a young woman recalled the person she’d linked up with sending her a message saying he’d wished she would have disclosed that she was “plus size” before they’d put effort into meeting up in person. Even though a big part of me chalked it up to young male immaturity on the guy’s part, the girl’s submission to the column has stuck with me since.
“After a recent in-person Bumble date,” her submission read, “my date (a cis man) texted me saying, ‘You should consider putting that you’re plus-size in your bio.’ I was appalled. My photos look like me—they’re an accurate representation. Why do I have to disclose that I’m not thin?”
The young woman brought up a thing that many people face in the filter-obsessed, “Instagram baddy” seeking online world we’re all living in. Even though we feel our online profiles might be an accurate representation of us, the question she posed was more focused on what we’re supposed to do if other people consider us as a ‘catfish’: a person who’s not as good-looking, attractive, or in this case, “thin” in real life as they are on their online profile.
As someone who’s on dating apps, and of legal age to be on them I might add (she was only 16), I can only imagine how discouraging and hurtful that must have felt for that young girl to hear. Even though I’m grown and might have some tougher skin towards handling the insanity that is online dating, I can still relate to her sensitivity about whether or not she should share the fact that she’s “not thin” to prospective suitors. While some wouldn’t consider me to be technically “plus-sized,” my reality is that I’m not thin either. In fact, most women in America aren’t.
Bumble, the online dating app mentioned in the girl’s submission, recently made an effort to combat the fatphobia and body shaming that can come with online dating. In a press release from earlier this week, the app announced that it was updating its “terms and conditions to explicitly ban unsolicited and derogatory comments made about someone’s appearance, body shape, size, or health.” What was great about the press release was that they gave clear terms for what body shaming is, how it could present itself on the app, and how community users could report any incidents of body shaming if they felt like they’ve been subjected to it.
“Body shaming is not acceptable on or off of the Bumble app,” the statement said. “For those who may not know, body shaming means forcing your opinion of a ‘good body’ onto others. It can come in the form of sending a message to someone that’s critical of their body or health, or by stating in your Bumble bio that a certain kind of body is unacceptable or undesirable. Body shaming includes fat shaming, health shaming, criticizing skin or hair, thin shaming, unsolicited opinions, and mocking someone’s physical features.”
“People who use body-shaming language in their profile or through the Bumble app’s chat function will receive a warning for their inappropriate behavior, and repeated incidents or particularly harmful comments will result in being banned from the platform,” the press release added. “If body shaming happens to you on Bumble you can report it using tools within the app, which include Block & Report, Unmatch & Report, and Hide & Report.”
The app’s effort to combat body shaming in online dating is a really big and needed step. According to CNBC, a Harvard study from 2019 found that “people who use dating apps are 2.7 to 16.2 times more likely to have an eating disorder than those who don’t use the apps,” with minority groups using them “having ‘significantly higher’ odds of using unhealthy weight management behaviors.”
Even though the issue may seem trivial to some, the study highlighted the complex dynamic the pressures of online dating and “not being a catfish” have on people, with the potential to lead to body dysmorphic thoughts, and subsequent eating disorders.
Speaking on how body shaming negatively impacts people’s health both mentally and physically, in their aforementioned press release, Bumble encouraged their users not to comment on other people’s body image at all.
“Body shaming can do harm to the mental and even physical health of its recipients, so if you’re not sure if a message will come across as body shaming, a good rule of thumb is simply not to comment on another user’s body or health at all. Find something else about their profile to talk about. Or, if you’re not interested in someone, you can swipe left.”
Even though Bumble’s “rule of thumb” might seem strict, the reality is that if people match on a dating app, they both clearly already think the other person is physically attractive or worth persuing to some extent. The app isn’t saying that people can’t exchange compliments on users’ appearances, but it is saying that shaming people for the way that they look, especially when it comes to their weight, will no longer be tolerated.
Bumble’s new standard won’t stop people from getting called a catfish, but it will curb people shaming others for their bodies and how they choose to present themselves online. That alone makes me feel better about using their app, dating their users, and feel more entitled to use their resources if I’ve been called out for being “not thin.” To those thinking, “Who cares whether people think I’m a catfish anyway?” the reality is that everyone cares, even if it’s just a little, and that’s okay. While everyone naturally shows photographs of themselves at their best angles, nobody wants to be considered a fake or a phony when things transfer off apps into the real world. Hopefully, a few other dating apps will follow suit.